Old Friends

Is there anything better than old friends?

If there is, I can’t imagine what it would be, but here is a short list of things that only old friends can do:

1- Remember what you looked like at 18, back when you “thought” you were fat, but you looked better than you ever would, yet they still tell you that you look better than ever. Even when they secretly know that it takes you 2 hours every morning, to roll your breasts into you bra in a such a way that they appear perky.

2- Pick up exactly where you left off, no matter how long it’s been since you last saw each other, there are no awkward pauses, you just start going from where you last were, and know you will do the same next time you see each other.

3- Know who you really are, in all your many incarnations through the years, old friends know who you are at the core, that you haven’t changed much, and know how to deal with it when that same insecure teenager shows up in the guise of a 40 year old woman.

4- Make you laugh through the tears, they are the people that really get the “laughter through tears” scene in “Steel Magnolias” not only because it poignant, and true, but because they were sitting next to you the first time you saw it. They are the folks that fundamentally know that having a shoulder to cry on is all well and good, but a true friend is the one that makes you laugh at, and through anything.

5- Know that “laughing until you wet your pants” has long ago ceased to be a cute little metaphor, that now laughing without wetting your pants is nothing short of a miracle, which is why you carry spare underwear at all times. Also knowing the surest bet to laughing until you wet you pants is to tell various stories about laughing (or sneezing, or heck just standing there) until you wet your pants.

6- Don’t take you too seriously; they already know what a dork you are at heart, you don’t even have to explain.

7- Realize that at almost 40 you gained a lot of things, weight, a little wisdom, and the sure knowledge and confidence to sing along to all of “Mama Mia” no matter how quiet everyone else is in the theater. You may loose things with aging (perky boobs), but it’s worth it to gain the confidence to stop and belt out “Dancing Queen” wherever and whenever.

To end with the predictable song lyric (Sondheim of course, but this is the Barry Manilow version):

Hey old friend,
Are you o.k. old friend?
What do you say old friend
Are we or are we unique?
Time goes by
Everything else keeps changing
You and I, we get continued next week.

Most friends fade
Or they don’t make the grade
New ones are quickly made
And in a pinch, sure they’ll do

But us old friend
What’s to discuss old friend
Here’s to us
Who’s like us?

Damn few